Blogging PostsQuality Articles On Wide Range Of Topics. Share Practical Skills.

The Victorian Era had so many rules for proper behavior in social settings including the use of calling cards that allowed the butler to properly introduce your entrance to any home. That is so far from the reality of today but what has replaced it?

In those days, entertaining was made easy and carefree by the use of butlers, maids and cooks. A host would just have to decide on the menu, the guest list and which china service to use and all the remaining details would be completed behind the scenes by a team of people. The rules of etiquette from the host and hostess, the guests and the staff were well laid out and everyone was very aware of their place and role. Although it was highly structured, it did not lack any ambiguity of rules of etiquette that we are found with today.

Today we no longer place any importance on the pretentiousness and rules that came with the Victorian era. It is much more important to make sure that all of the guests and the hosts are relaxed and comfortable, easily enjoying the food and company that the host has lovingly prepared with their own hands. Etiquette is just as important as it was during the olden days but are we as prepared as our ancestors as to what those rules are?

The necessity for inviting guests to a dinner party used to require that they were engraved on beautiful stationary and hand delivered by a servant. For a guest to respond to the invitation it was required that you respond immediately to the host with a formal response as well. Today we do not require that level of formality for anything other than a wedding or other formal affair but that does not mean that we have been reduced to the lack of consideration by using email for our invitations either.

It was customary to dress in your finest during Victorian times, but now, many dinner party invitations now stipulate a more relaxed atmosphere and may say that it is casual dress. We have retained, though, the etiquette that one should never dress in a manner that one ups ones host or hostess.

The etiquette in days gone by were very easy to follow in regards to the requirement of a hostess gift. Manners and the correct etiquette also covered areas like when to arrive to a dinner party, how long to stay and how to behave while in attendance. Men knew their roles on how to behave with a lady including holding her seat out before sitting themselves and a lady was very aware of which utensils to use when and how use fold your napkin. Today we have more open and vague rules but do not be tempted to think that the rules have been abolished all together.

Men are still required to stand when a lady excuses herself from the dining table. It is customary to turn off all cell phones when entering a hosts home and it is considered to be bad manners to take anything but emergency phone calls when you are in attendance. Should such an emergency occur, it is rude to take the call while at the table, please excuse yourself to a more private place to allow you privacy and the dining to continue simultaneously.

Hosts should prepare in advance for the special dietary requirements of their guests. It is recommended that while you are inviting your guests that you inquire into everyone’s special diet requirements and personal tastes. It is so much better to address this issue early in the planning process rather than be surprised at the last minute. Should an unexpected food requirement arise during the dinner party, graciously address the situation to the best of your ability but do not feel that you need to cook an entire new meal at the last minute. The consumption of alcohol is not only a social etiquette issue but it also crosses moral and legal issues. Be careful not to over consume nor let your guests.

It is normal for people to make a mistake on social etiquette rules from time to time. When mistakes occur it is best not to not make a big deal about them. If you are the person making the mistake it is best to immediately apologize for your blunder and then do your best to move onward. If you are host noticing a blunder of one of your guests, it is imperative that control the situation as best as you can and allow the mistake to addressed at another time. Unless the error is a behavior issue that is affecting your other guests, then as the host it is your responsibility to correctly address and correct the problem. Recognizing and working within the current social etiquette rules will make your social calendar soar and disregarding of them will be the key to your social loneliness.